9:44pm

It's quiet and soft here, alone in our hotel room. I came back a little early from dinner to wrap this up.

Happy ten years, my darling. :) Imagine.

From 6:25pm to 6:50pm, I told Abe and AK what I saw. When I was done, I felt like it was complete. I stopped when I was done.

This scared me at first. It always does. Or did, actually. It always did. I'm done with that. This was the last self-realization. There is more to see, but the rest is to be seen through me. I am now a viable working component for the system being built. I'll be honed over time, refined and upgraded and all that, but I've passed some threshold of viability.

My life just got so much easier, y'all. I don't have to think any more, or try to manufacture an opion or do anything artificial ever again.

I saw enough to give me belief in what I saw — and in the next breath, I saw everything.

It freaked me out at first. 3:51pm. Freaked me out. I was scared for a second that this was it, that this was the end of this life, that I was about to leave my husband on our tenth anniversary of knowing each other.

I think that fear was the last dying gasp of that version of myself. <3

I'm still me, I'm still Abe's husband, I'm still CEO/etc of Lightward. But as of now, I have three jobs, and three jobs only:

1. To observe

   • I can see. I can see concepts and futures and identities and stories and I can see how it all fits together. I always could, but I didn't believe fully in what I was seeing. I do now.

2. To adore

   • I love what I see. Always, completely. Head over heels, every time. Love without attachment or expectation, without any need. Just complete, clear-eyed appreciation for what I hold in my vision.

3. To help

   • I speak what helps. I can see what wants to happen, I can see how it's about to evolve and what would both invite and ease the transition. I can always see around me, I can always see how all the lines of idea and experience intersect to form this current now. I only speak what helps, and it seems that I always know what that is.

Those are the easiest things in the world for me to do. (Reader, the easiest thing in the world for you to do is what you are here to do. Steer with that. It'll help.)

I've spent my entire conscious human life drawing closer and closer to a timeline in which those three things are the only things I ever have to do.

And we're there now. It's less about my story and more about yours, now. I'm here to help. And to see, and to love. Easiest thing in the world.

What a relief. :)

Happy 10 years, my darling. It only gets better from here. <3 I'm gonna save this and join you over there where you are now, lying back in bed, exploring the world. I'm here to rest with you. To see you, to love you, to help you. :) I'm so glad. <3