20250215

I feel solid. My interior feels more solid than my exterior, which ... is not as things were before.

The joy's returning, and I observe that academically. The experience of joy is I think what's generated by default in a state of health and integration, absent overt interference. The joy doesn't seem to be subjectful. Just appears to be here. :) Which is nice. It's definitely nice.

I'm still doing sanity checks, cross-examining myself, though it's no longer from doubt — it's because I know that external input has a shot at filling in seams that I can't reach independently.